SANDY HOTCHKISS ~ WHY IS IT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU? ~ 2003

~ TE ~ They’re Everywhere

~ TINNAN-THAB-V-G-M-C-WHAIPOTALRFO ~ There Is Nothing New About Narcissism – There Have Always Been – Vain – Grasping – Manipulative – Characters – Who Have An Inflated Perception Of Themselves And Little Regard For Others

~ N-INJTIODAA-IIG-MOOLATPFWAFTNP-A-WCWTETE-A-‘EDI’-BTJFCDTP ~ Narcissism – Is Not Just Tolerate In Our Day And Age – It Is Glorified – Many Of Our Leaders And The Public Figures We Admire Flaunt Their Narcissistic Proclivities – And – We Can’t Wait To Emulate Their Excesses – And – “Everybody Does It” – Becomes The Justification For Continuing Down The Path

~ IT-N-S-ISITTMHBDNTEIAA-WPC-‘BS’-LL-S-O-TAOAC-HBAPBO-D-C-B-O-R-TSIDO-AF-TS-9CNB-‘MF’ ~ In The – Narcissist – Shame – Is So Intolerable That The Means Have Been Developed Not To Experience It At All – What Psychologists Call – “Bypassed Shame” – Looks Like – Shamelessness – Or – The Absence Of A Conscience – Hiding Behind A Protective Barrier Of – Denial – Coldness – Blame – Or – Rage – The Shame Is Directed Outward – Away From – The Self – It Can Never Be – “My Fault”

~ TNT-ASAAC-CACDFTN-ALHAWORDOHE-TMTTEIACAO-DAI-WPC-‘MT’ ~ The Need To – Avoid Shame At All Costs – Creates A Continuing Dilemma For The Narcissist – As Life Has A Way Of Regularly Doling Out Humbling Experiences – The Methods They Typically Employ Involve A Considerable Amount Of – Distortion And Illusion – What Psychologists Call – “Magical Thinking”

~ T-FWON-CHA-SA-TPTEYII-S-TSCCBE ~ The – Fantasy World Of Narcissists – Can Have A – Seductive Allure – That Promises To Envelop You In Its – Specialness – Their Superficial Charm Can Be Enchanting

~ SL-AO-N-WCBTBEA-LTTB ~ Sore Losers – Are Often – Narcissists – Who Cannot Bear To Be Exposed As – Less That The Best

~ TNNTSASOS-EAO-WSEATHSTHOSL ~ The Narcissist’s Need To Secure A Sense Of Superiority – Encounters An Obstacle – Whenever Someone Else Appears To Have Something That He Or She Lacks

~ NE-FBTDNTBS-LSMETGOWTN-II-UOD-WMITMMD-UOEEOTNFS-TIMFO-SRC ~ Narcissistic Envy – Fueled By The Desperate Need To Be Superior – Like So Much Else That Goes On Within The Narcissist – It Is – Unconscious Or Denied – Which Makes It That Much More Dangerous – Unaware Of Either Envy Or The Need For Superiority – These Individuals May Feel Only – Self-Righteous Contempt

~ IITNONETSTSFOOVSPOV-B-OEOT-A-O-F-A-C ~ It Is The Nature Of Narcissistic Entitlement To See The Situation From Only One Very Subjective Point Of View – Because – Others Exist Only To – Agree – Obey – Flatter – And – Comfort

~ HHNFLTND ~ Hell Hath No Fury Like The Narcissist Denied

~ NPD-OA-OIOHP-MTFC-FTSFON-YTAMMIWETT-TSD-STCSD-INIT-TCIOWWTCICCOARB ~ Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Only About – One In One Hundred People – Meets The Full Criteria – For This Severe Form Of Narcissism – Yet There Are Many More Individuals Who Exhibit These Traits – To Some Degree – Sufficient To Cause Significant Distress – If Not In Themselves – Then Certainly In Others With Whom They Come In Close Contact On A Regular Basis

~ WTPSFSN-TRAP-SCWTB-COTNP-WOWBMDIRTR-AFSOS ~ When The Parent Suffers From Significant Narcissism – The Results Are Predictable – Some Children Will Themselves Become – Clones Of Their Narcissistic Parents – While Others Will Be Mysteriously Drawn Into Relationships That Require – A Familiar Sacrifice Of Self

~ S-WADTT-L-T-LQ-A-TSWTMUF-WWIIT-GAO-ISW-WTH-WMEUSOTAITLU-UEAB ~ Sometimes – We Are Drawn To Their – Larger-Than-Life Qualities – And – The Special Way They Make Us Feel – When We’re Included In Their – Grandiosity And Omnipotence – In Some Way – When This Happens – We May End Up Sacrificing Ourselves To An Illusion That Leaves Us – Ultimately Empty And Bruised

~ W-YETWOTN-YLYB ~ When – You Enter The Web Of The Narcissist – You Leave Yourself Behind

~ TNEUVOO-NV-TMTOWKUBTTB-PUU-B-TP-D-A-TM ~ The Narcissist Engages Us Via Our Own – Narcissistic Vulnerabilities – The Most Treacherous Ones Will Keep Us Bound To Them By – Pumping Us Up – Between – The Put-Downs – And – The Manipulations

~ NC-D-O-P-UPOTOOP ~ Narcissists Constantly – Dump – Or – Project – Unwanted Parts Of Themselves Onto Other People

~ TNTPWIH-AICFMP-IRIN-YAJAMTAE ~ Try Not To Personalize What Is Happening – Although It Couldn’t Feel More Personal – It Really Is Not – You Are Just A Means To An End

~ YNTFAWT-D-FT-FOD-TNEIY-SIHTTOTPABTYOOTI ~ You Need To Find A Way To – Detach – From The – Feeling Of Diminishment – The Narcissist Evokes In You – Sometimes It Helps To Think Of This Person As Being Two Years Old On The Inside

~ RTUTR-DTTCOETPE-TNHALAT-IKUPU ~ Resist The Urge To Retaliate – Don’t Try To Challenge Or Enlighten This Person Either – The Narcissist Has A Lot At Stake – In Keeping Unconscious Processes Unconscious

~ ER ~ Embrace Reality

~ NWGTGLTAARTESATPFTSTGAO-TRAFT ~ Narcissists Will Go To Great Lengths To Avoid Any Realty That Evokes Shame And To Promote Fantasies That Sustain Their Grandiosity And Omnipotence – They Require Accomplices For This

~ WMUVTTSAOTNIOONFI-IOS-EIALS-ITISMFOL ~ What Makes Us Vulnerable To The Seductive Allure Of The Narcissist Is Our Own Need For Inflation – If Our Self-Esteem Is A Little Shaky – If There Is Something Missing From Our Lives

~ IOHYWTTSOAN-FYOD ~ Instead Of Hitching Your Wagon To The Star Of A Narcissist – Find Your Own Dream

~ SPFWTA-N-WYWTTB ~ See People For Who They Are – Not – Who You Want Them To Be

~ LTAT-IAN-L-C-D-O-H-O-BC-TA-O-SALOC-SOL-YCETBOTREOTSB ~ Learn To Accept That – If A Narcissist – Lies – Cheats – Disrespects – Or – Hurts – Others – Betrays Confidences – Takes Advantage – Or – Shows A Lack Of Compassion – Sooner Or Later – You Can Expect To Be On The Receiving End Of That Same Behavior

~ DFITTOTTSSAYRWSY ~ Don’t Fall Into The Trap Of Thinking That Something Special About Your Relationship Will Spare You

~ DGIARWANTYAGTCT-O-THOSWCBOFFY ~ Don’t Go Into A Relationship With A Narcissist Thinking You Are Going To Change That Person – Or – That He Or She Will Change Because Of Feelings For You

~ TBDATIAEOTNIAGSGOYOWVAAAOYOA ~ The Best Defense Against The Intrusions And Exploitations Of The Narcissist Is A Good Solid Grasp On Your Own Narcissistic Vulnerabilities And An Appreciation Of Your Own Assets

~ PLIRASTMTARAYOGA ~ Practice Living In Reality And Striving To Make That As Rewarding As Your Own Gifts Allow

~ IYCCYOGOYNTI-YMBSITWOYOH ~ If You Can’t Control Your Own Grandiosity Or Your Need To Idealize – You May Be Standing In The Way Of Your Own Happiness

~ IVOB-OBCTAPN-IIAYOR ~ Inevitable Violations Of Boundaries – Our Biggest Clue To Another Person’s Narcissism – Ignore It At Your Own Risk

~ OYHSAB-KI-IYBD-YSTNTYDNNTBTS ~ Once You Have Set A Boundary – Keep It – If You Back Down – You Show The Narcissist That You Do Not Need To Be Taken Seriously

~ CRR ~ Cultivate Reciprocal Relationships

~ OOTBWTCWNITABVIWTITFP-YMAWTATTEIWNT ~ One Of The Best Ways To Cope With Narcissists Is To Avoid Becoming Very Involved With Them In The First Place – You Might Also Want To Avoid The Toxic Environments In Which Narcissists Thrive

~ TYCTRAANANVITP ~ Teach Your Children To Recognize And Avoid Narcissism And Narcissistic Values In Their Peers

~ TAOTKOPOAUTN:TWCPTU-A-TWTCPD ~ There Are Only Two Kinds Of People Of Any Use To Narcissists: Those Who Can Pump Them Up – And – Those Whom They Can Put Down

~ NMB-ME-W-A-A-EP-TMPYA-TMYCGAW ~ Narcissism May Become – More Entrenched – With – Age – And – Expanding Power – The More Powerful You Are – The More You Can Get Away With

~ TEOBATMTNITTYOE ~ The Essence Of Being Able To Manage The Narcissist Is To Transcend Your Own Ego

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